Entry 0004::The Circus
The air hangs heavy today, thick with the mugginess of pre-storm anticipation, but also with the weight of a thousand uncompleted tasks. My to-do list has morphed into a three-ring circus of aspirations, a spectacle of possibilities that threatens to devour my motivation with each passing hour. Lately, it’s been a challenge to separate the “coulds,” the “shoulds,” and the essential “must-dos” from each other. But that’s the beauty of this internal circus, isn’t it?
The Billy Bass project aka BQUBD, my fish puppet and ollama.ai integration personal project, could be my high-wire act, a daring exploration of creativity that teeters between exhilarating possibility and potential disaster. Will it be a masterpiece or a tangled mess? Only time (and maybe a little duct tape) will tell.
Meanwhile, my friends and I are hatching a business venture would be the trapeze act of this internal circus. It’s a thrilling leap of faith, filled with the potential for breathtaking success or a spectacular, albeit educational, plummet.
But amidst the excitement, there’s the lions and tigers of the “shoulds.” The nagging chores, the looming job search, they pace restlessly in their cages, reminding me that even the most thrilling acts require a foundation of responsibility. For example, paying the bills might not be the most glamorous act, but it keeps the popcorn machine humming and the lights shining bright.
Then there are the unassuming heroes, the backbone of the circus — the Janitors of the “musts.” These are the folks who ensure the show goes on, unseen but essential. Taking care of myself, spending quality time with family — these are the quiet tasks that keep the performers fueled, the popcorn machine humming, and the audience happy.
The trick, I’m realizing, isn’t to banish any performer from the circus. It’s about becoming a skilled ringmaster, wielding my metaphorical whip to orchestrate this grand balancing act. It’s about understanding that some high-wire acts might need to be postponed for a lion feeding session, while others deserve a chance to take center stage.
The key is to ensure the Janitors of the “musts” have the resources they need. This might mean delegating some tasks, saying no to extra commitments, or simply carving out time for self-care. A well-rested ringmaster and a happy family make for a smoother-running show, after all. (I know I will get some laughs from the readers who know me to think I am any sort of master of any ring at home. The Kid and Buddy Man are the center of its universe and my wife is the center of mine. We all know she is the ring master!)
So, here’s to embracing the cacophony, the “shoulds,” “coulds,” and “musts” that make life such a rich and complex journey. Let’s celebrate the small victories — completing a nagging chore, making progress on a “could,” and finding moments of joy with the family. And remember, we don’t have to run this circus alone.
Let’s share and learn from each other in the comments below! I made a personal website. You can see it here.
